When you search for the meaning of overthinking, the first definition that will come up is: Think about something too much for too long. All of us can agree on the fact that overthinking is such a buzzkill. You are enjoying your day and randomly you hop on the overthinking train and the day gets spoilt. Controlling your thoughts and bringing the train to a halt always seems like a massive task. Overthinking is one of the root causes of unhappiness in our day-to-day lives and is a trap that everyone falls prey to.
But the question is, what does "too much" quantify? How much is too much? Overthinking is a rabbit hole none of us want to fall into. Once we start overthinking, it is just a downward spiral from there. By the time we do realize and stop ourselves, it is already too late. Overthinking stems from people-pleasing, low self-esteem, and low confidence in one's decisions. So how do we control it?
Before we get into the different methods to reduce overthinking, it is crucial to understand that you won't see instant results. You won't wake up one day and just stop overthinking. Just like everything else, this is a process. A process that differs from person to person and situation to situation. All you need is a little patience and love for yourself.
With that out of the way, let us get into it:
1. People Don't Care: At least not as much as you think they do. They won't remember the one time you tripped and fell or the one time you stuttered on stage. Just like you don't remember everything about everyone.
2. Don't drag the past into the present: Stop going back to unpleasant memories and exaggerating them in your head. It is usually not as big of a deal as it seems to be. Let the past be where it should be - in the past.
3. Trust Your Choices: When you believe in yourself and the choices you make, you won't be questioning yourself at 2 at the midnight. Remember that you have already made your choice; there is no point in dwelling on it now. Let the consequences play out the way they are meant to. What is meant to happen will happen, no matter what.
4. Stop Fearing The Future: A lot of our overthinking consists of worrying and fearing our future. What if I don't achieve my goals? What if something goes wrong? All of these thoughts just lead to more fear and anxiety. Plan and take all the actions required to make the future you dream of coming true, but after that, take a step back and let things play out the way they should. Do not break your head over things you have no control over.
5. Other People's Behaviour Is Not Under Your Control: How people react to your feelings, your actions or circumstances is out of your control. Do not mull over how little or too much the other person reacted. Everybody is fighting their own battles and everybody has their bad days. Try to let go when you start looking back at conversations, stop yourself before you dig in too much.
6. Work On Yourself: Take time to introspect on your weak points and on the places where you need to work on yourself. The more you build a relationship with yourself, the more you'll start trusting yourself, and the more confident you'll become. Meditation is a great way to sit with your thoughts and understand your mind better. Even five minutes makes a huge impact.
7. Stop Taking Life So Seriously: So what if your friend said they don't want to hang out today? Instead of thinking about the why and feeling bad, go out with yourself. You don't have to start thinking about all the reasons why they said no. Just let it go. So what if one paper didn't go the way you thought it would? Work twice as hard the next time and you'll absolutely get there. I'm not telling you to let go and stop working towards your dreams, all I'm saying is that you deserve to have fun while doing it.
Remember that life is meant to be enjoyed and only you can bring about the changes you need. Take a deep breath and let go whenever you hold on too tight to something. It is not always easy but all we can do is try.
Sometimes the worst place you can be is in your own head. -Anonymous.
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